Another Definition of Success

In “The Strangest Secret”, Earl Nightingale gives his definition of success:

Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.

You don’t need piles of money.

Lots of achievements.

A degree. Or a house. Or a car.

You just need to set a worthy goal, and steadily work toward making it a reality.

Do that, and you’re a success.

Job security is an illusion

Boss dropping employee down a hidden trap doorI’ve had a lot of jobs. Most of which I’ve hated.

I know I’m not alone there.

Most of us will stay in jobs we hate because we think they’re secure. As long as we keep showing up the money will keep flowing.

Most employment is at-will. That means you can quit any time you like. For any reason. Or no reason. I’ve done that plenty of times.

It also means you can lose your job at any time. Maybe you showed up late one too many times. Sick one too many days. Your car broke down too many times.

Maybe the company just can’t afford to pay all of it’s employees anymore. Or they just don’t want to.

Maybe you’re being replaced by someone from China. Or India. Or a robot.

As long as you work for someone else, you’re placing your future in their hands.

Is that secure?

What does it mean to be a man?

mystery manA man is an adult male human. There’s more to it than that, though.

We learn what it is to be a man from the men around us. Usually our dads.

My dad died when I was three.

When I was little my favorite show was Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. Fred Rogers was a big role model for me.

Fortunately both my grandpas lived into my adulthood. They lived close by for most of that time. They both enjoyed teasing their grandkids.

My mom called her dad when she needed help. Whether it was the car, the plumbing, or anything else, he was the first one on the job. I held the flashlight. I went with him to the hardware store. He built my pinewood derby cars with me. He soldered the connections on my science project, a burglar alarm. He always said I could talk to him. I wish I hadn’t been so shy. I wish I could still talk to him.

I had great scout leaders. One was the Assistant Scout Master. Assistant in name only. He loved Scouting. He was really Gung-ho for it. The Scout Master seemed content to let him take charge. He was outgoing, friendly, and full of energy. He became the Explorer Leader around the time I became an Explorer. I wouldn’t have gotten very far in scouting without him. He died too young. I named my youngest son after him.

I didn’t get serious about my Eagle until I was sixteen-and-a-half. Another great leader helped me get it. I had a ton of merit badges I had to earn. He acted as counselor for almost all of them. He was also on my Eagle Board of Review. Another member of the board tried to persuade the others I hadn’t satisfied the requirements. He persuaded them I had. We were both active in the Order of the Arrow. I believe he was the one who nominated me for the Vigil Honor.

I’ve had a lot of good bishops. One was bishop of a singles ward I attended. Whenever he needed inspiration he would sit back and close his eyes and wait. He was always kind, never harsh or judgemental. I never felt like I couldn’t talk to him.

Then there are the action movie star types. John Wayne. Clint Eastwood. Bruce Willis. Harrison Ford. Arnold. Sometimes I wish I was more like them. Tougher. Less emotional.

The Ultimate Man, though, is our Heavenly Father.

He’s who we came here to be like.

Point of Origin

Pin in a mapMy starting point:

I’m 41 years old.

I’ve been separated from my wife for a year and a half.

She lives in her parent’s basement. Our two boys live with her.

I live in my mom’s basement.

I weigh 400 pounds.

I’m unemployed.

I’m a porn addict.

That’s the bad news.

The good news:

I get to see my boys almost every day.

I go to church.

I pray morning and night (most days).

I read my scriptures every day.

I read lots of other books.

I have a car.

I have my freedom.

I have a Savior.

I have more blessings than I can count.

I know I can improve myself.

It’s just going to take a lot of work.