“Don’t tell people your goals”

Is this a good idea?

Or do I need people to hold me accountable?

I suspect the answer is, “A little from column A, and a little from column B.”

Are there positive people in your life who will help and support you? Tell them.

The crabs can stay in the dark. They’ll find out what your goals were when you accomplish them.

Another Definition of Success

In “The Strangest Secret”, Earl Nightingale gives his definition of success:

Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.

You don’t need piles of money.

Lots of achievements.

A degree. Or a house. Or a car.

You just need to set a worthy goal, and steadily work toward making it a reality.

Do that, and you’re a success.

“Only Say Positive Things”

In his speech, “The Strangest Secret”, Earl Nightingale issues a challenge. He says to keep a card in your pocket for a month. On one side should be your goal for that month, and on the other side should be Matthew 7:7-8:

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

Look at the card several times a day, to remind yourself of your goal.

My goal this month is, “Only Say Positive Things.”

I underestimated how difficult this would be.

I have a tendency to complain. Quite a bit.

It’s hard to feel good about life when you complain so much.

It’s also hard to believe it will get better.

The month is still young, though.

I intend to achieve my goal, even if it takes several months.

It will be easier to achieve my other goals once I do.

Symptom of a Larger Problem?

One thing I’ve noticed recently is that I’m not tempted to watch porn when I’m feeling good. When I’m feeling down, angry, sad, lonely, etc, that’s when I feel the urge.

I didn’t become an addict because I was a bad person. Something was wrong. I felt bad. I wanted to feel better. I found something to relieves the pain, if only temporarily. In the long run it made things worse.

Maybe this sounds familiar. If so, find another way to feel better.

Show yourself some love. Real love. Be compassionate to yourself.

Think about all the good things in your life. Make an effort to feel grateful. Really feel it.

Make a goal. Start working toward it. Get help from someone else who’s done it before.

Spend time around good people. Get away from people who drag you down, or at least spend less time with them.

And obviously, pray for help to improve your life. Your Heavenly Father wants you to succeed.

You should, too.

Good friends

Crab crawling out of a barrelSome people don’t want you to change.

Ever.

Your growth makes them uncomfortable. It reminds them they need to change, too.

They don’t want to. That takes effort.

So they try to hold you back. Like crabs in a barrel. One crab tries to climb out. The others grab it and pull it back down.

You don’t need that in your life.

What you need are good friends. Friends who will help you achieve your goals.

Hold you accountable.

Help you get where you want to go.

Be who you want to be.

If you don’t have friends like that, it’s time to get some.

And ditch the crabs.